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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!6 i! v* m& h- P" Y; f
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写7 x) h# u' z8 s7 V
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
3 t/ k1 g8 A) L9 T) R3 p1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫1 X# c) G& p' V( x! B
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
. f$ n3 {! z. e  B; g- m/ {) \) Udown.# Y3 l+ i  H3 ?" j. v* x7 c
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about * ?2 _7 Z0 T/ {8 O
you3 x2 N/ u/ t, s+ V$ B# ?3 B1 ?: D
leaving it down.; U  o: E/ j7 s9 v* Q; V
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.2 U/ e) j; @! x! P" l9 l8 s' _
Let it be.
+ k: r- c6 Q/ ^0 _- q) r. G1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去1 U$ Z2 A/ _  H( T

! |2 K4 t: V9 w( {3 @* s1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it) ?( a+ t) f, D( i! f3 V
that way.) Y) {" W3 v" g7 \* c
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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1. Crying is blackmail.
- o( t4 {( @  ~: H  z2 g1,哭泣是敲诈# n" `. i( [5 B; ~
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1. Ask for what you want.
7 j9 y  `: m. D  S3 m: l6 {Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!0 @% \4 H' a- O3 K
Strong hints do not work!3 Y$ X% o. o; Y! f0 i7 ?
Obvious hints do not work!, ~* Q/ k6 R# n# Z, k8 J. k
Just say it!
2 a/ H: o/ t2 V9 Q  W. I1,你想要什么就说
7 ]  F+ A1 B/ `2 p1 U( O  b  L9 ~3 g4 R我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!6 a0 Q( z- H- r  h+ s4 ~
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
8 I1 [/ S/ i) o; X& squestion.4 ~6 s$ \9 ~, S) }' s3 Y
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's( h$ l  v1 ?% t
what we do., _* q- O2 b( [3 N! b! _
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
# b0 w' C5 j, T  E" _- X* s* H1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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6 o0 Q- _3 J9 c, s1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.. K/ [! C) k0 |
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去
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/ V  j. Z" X8 y/ z1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.5 Y" m& \9 A1 V8 a/ R
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
% F: M" b- m' c2 [我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us6 M" G, |9 f) l( t& p- t
to act like soap opera guys.+ \4 h8 i! k" @5 z3 v
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们1 P/ O" g5 J4 }; j  n
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
5 h8 j! Q. @: y1 \( I1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
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  t: e  _0 h5 ?$ j/ S% @1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways: q+ q; Z! ?5 H6 _1 c8 V& ]( u
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.% M, b# g+ P; A) K9 P
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢); B( T: ^' M3 L7 I9 E3 c: _) ~
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it2 W. C: ^. I5 N  @8 u  H' v
done. Not both.! ?% m2 t  a  _; F, m9 e
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.0 r; M8 S, C# z8 ]4 U: O) m
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during, F0 K/ ~: C/ }3 @4 H$ |: @8 Z
commercials.0 ]/ \" R# k& ^- p- Q* H' b% ^
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.. T9 g. N* ]0 M% I" w2 M# M3 t

2 D+ H5 p  i$ e; V9 y1 y3 k1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.3 X  ~  k  g. u  M9 R0 W
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
" W$ U/ d6 _6 \/ FWe have no idea what mauve is.& ?( @3 x; P& J7 ?& L
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.  N7 a) f8 C2 L3 @! t4 y  {& j/ r
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
" p% Y3 }) ~9 W; |8 N: @- J) d1 enothing's wrong.
" J, h: n+ u' hWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer& t3 \7 g5 @; _) N
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is5 j3 c: z9 b8 z: r; N% i
fine...Really.
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7 A2 ]6 l/ L( _1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to: y- o/ d0 r! l# z% q: b% X; W# T
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.# d& j* q/ N8 }- `; E/ H7 N8 L
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1. You have enough clothes.* P0 i5 U$ _2 f# Y

8 `6 ~" C3 B6 A5 P* b+ ^1. You have too many shoes." v/ I0 s- G  ^7 S8 c
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!2 y. g. x. |5 L* O9 R1 X* a

) S5 M8 K) j! a8 a4 r1. Thank you for reading this.! w  ~) B! A) x

% N) s# C# U( MYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
( p2 x9 @( |  k; [' s. O' J' QBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
/ O1 Z# d( a' D& L: C- {Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。, a. t/ W: |; \9 X! p
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# `* N2 E6 J+ X+ c1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?( I1 C+ Y3 Y# X: Y* r& P
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
) u) _8 E; L$ t" s" b2 m% n1 v- a我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.( y% c! ~" _  m6 y/ ~4 o' V1 E
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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: E0 i! A1 S$ d7 b1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.0 J* c. c9 k. @: S6 z4 @) D
如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。
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; O/ l" O$ q$ q1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.8 v3 |% z$ |$ O4 m, B
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.
* N; f/ Z- t0 B3 F5 n如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
* @- O& z) O! Q! F$ WALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.1 Y$ o1 X1 r; \8 n
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
, b$ p5 a5 A8 \, m' o- [& T* U: g

" ?: x6 Z" v- A这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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$ B2 }2 e, s$ L$ J% `还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.
2 ~% j* s4 l. ^2 Z# `* S! W* `3 D如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你  W+ ]1 W3 y: i
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. y) E  T0 a( Z' g1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.0 a& X! w! L, ^1 _) Q, T; s
不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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# j# C+ T  I, S  s4 u$ o) Q1. You have enough clothes.! O, p5 |0 W4 _8 m; N+ g
你的衣服足够多了/ f. Q( d& i2 e1 o, T
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1. You have too many shoes.7 t& c& l* z' I( A
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!' _0 N. P: c0 i; \! C* O+ t0 S
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.2 @- v, F6 ~( |9 R2 C* [# i6 i
多谢你能看完这个
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.) ^* u" P* R- Q
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:% y# |0 m& J+ u' Q+ O% P  }
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置/ X& ]6 y' G- b+ A  G
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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7 A! F% Z* j2 I; [应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:
% F4 x+ {' P' m! N1. You have enough clothes.! F0 g- P9 [6 @, M0 Y
你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes." d; _$ a  m* n) t8 e/ M- J
你的鞋子也太多了吧

$ u6 D* m. I- v9 o: q2 ?这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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1 h& ~, |) `& g----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.* L- D' L% G) k6 C  k" z% m
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
) s+ D# w  G- }3 |% C1 LStrong hints do not work!
+ [5 K* r: u% q" V1 L8 K9 TObvious hints do not work!8 j: {& C: Y5 e7 q- S$ o
Just say it!  H% ]/ h/ U6 t. Y9 P; B8 ~2 c! }4 k
1,你想要什么就说( p- o6 b3 }9 X! z2 [1 ^
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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3 I$ U0 r( D, C3 y  l, P关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
: G3 E9 m5 {: N# x; z) m- p1. Ask for what you want.
( ^' W  [8 l: v% ], E& E% {Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
# m5 w9 Z! X7 H$ X7 W( sStrong hints do not work!
# u1 I' l4 [+ F) }+ uObvious hints do not work!
0 V, U9 W2 h- d; H" H8 v; e- W# J+ ^- xJust say it!
) ~% F/ i* U% ~4 W- E9 v9 L1,你想要什么就说! g: i0 d) R- H- c- @
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...
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9 X  X$ m7 [2 J- m4 u  G  T/ w瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:8 Q- m9 @  T+ M; H
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:
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' _6 h* Y9 ?3 Q: J/ Q9 e咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿, c/ ~, ^# p% b0 \' Y* d
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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, S! [6 e9 T) P3 W# F+ G: J这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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" C; `; m- B4 M5 T2 w5 L8 s# \+ _( D还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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- x) D" f1 a- `& O0 M5 J; B还想问问你的体会呢!

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* U4 M$ A- n, R, m3 C体会?/ I0 e# s- N7 U# H% N

+ g# o# Q& w9 `( {1 [$ ]: H. Y回答到那个帖子下面了
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