鲜花( 634) 鸡蛋( 5)
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Originally posted by shuishijie at 2005-6-24 12:15 PM:3 L# Y ]9 x, A3 C1 j* V
i sense a little tension here
% Y$ [! u6 U9 ]9 V) J: zsorry, i didn't mean you by 'you' which is a general reference.+ U% D. [4 V7 V! s5 Q. r$ j
back to our discussion, you are absolutely right.
( A2 ]. R& C! Y: ~if she/he 有那金刚钻, ie. intelligence and self-control, then she/he 就能揽这瓷器活儿.
6 G" n. q% B! [1 W- j( qFurthermore, if she/he cheated and is able to hide it for the rest of her/his life, then she/he has to bear with the guilty for the rest of her/his life.6 r& r. h. v+ R2 T$ ~7 A' \" [
If both cheated and can face it very well, then both of them will be worried if the other will cheat again.
( [5 N; z0 U. \* Q- c+ [" oIf both are not worried about the other cheating, then is this a marriage you want? u& b. q) \# o$ T
Not mean you here 1 s$ \; X+ Y( P6 N
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没有没有,没有任何敌意, 随便聊天。
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* f8 N6 X1 [9 P' l# U1 r( N其实我只是说一种可能性,并没有道德评价,或者人身安插。
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6 }0 ]9 W$ p/ R! n0 I你后面的三种情形,不同的人,不同的情商,不同的原则,处理情况也不同,有的一样可以花好月圆,有的则是一团乱麻。所以我说的“金刚钻“的比喻,是说没有大家都搞定的本事(搞定情人老婆劳工和自己),就别冒险。$ G9 e3 n# i% t' ?
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比如前几天看到杂志里谈到“处理婚外恋“说得好,向你的伴侣坦白之前,先想一想,如果你只是想摆脱guilty感觉,那么向伴侣坦白,等于把自己的负担转移给你的伴侣而已,对你的婚姻毫无好处,那么不如跟心理医生讲述。除非这次婚外行为有性疾病的可能,你需要带你的伴侣去就医。所以还是说呢, if you can not take the heat, get out of the kitchen.
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& W5 U8 Y7 e k5 s+ K我本人对夫妻远距离生存,各找临时情人,是持理解通融的态度的。我并不羡慕那些多年分离还守身如玉的夫妻。当然我也崇尚夫妻的忠诚,所以我更希望的是常相厮守。 |
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