鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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/ m/ J4 h/ s# p* Y: y4 Q; IWhy did God make mothers?- b L( g% _+ s4 m% g. S
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.) c7 C) o7 v6 l$ p2 l
2. Mostly to clean the house.
; H2 n; ?9 N& f ?% Z( R3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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/ c! e, b# K) O) i: fHow did God make mothers? $ K4 T3 Y& D. ^, T
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.$ H+ w3 ~) ^) r0 {
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. + O. v B7 R$ h' t& X& F( |, i+ _
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. 7 o9 q' I* X8 ]# O& T( A
, N4 M5 A" a8 n5 y6 a, `What ingredients are mothers made of ? , x, u8 p) n! n7 f' `! U/ k5 m
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 5 Y% F: A5 ~9 F+ ]/ `
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 8 e/ ^% @5 ?6 j1 T
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ( r A. F8 r+ q4 A6 j4 X$ Y8 I
1. We're related.; h5 V! x* ^, j S% v
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. : {( Q2 w y% S! }& O
# i$ Q' ]8 ~7 n& I8 |2 ]What kind of little girl was your mom? & N0 g+ m2 {( C- P0 t2 T) I) A
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
* f" k6 A {' h! M8 o: J2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ' D) D) F0 W1 l9 C( a: b* |5 s8 L
3. They say she used to be nice. * O6 n& l7 u9 F6 A& h/ |
* |' C6 [& e, ]! i/ y0 {6 ]) e2 Z8 a! ]What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? % n5 i4 n$ C# |" j
1. His last name.
6 ~/ R- A$ c6 k+ N7 s2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
0 E( c |$ k1 j2 [2 O4 O3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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- o U8 H" N! ]4 g5 x% XWhy did your mom marry your dad?
$ ?2 G$ Q: W5 I q& V1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
7 y: z: o# j/ R4 }9 r) M2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 8 q; d; {% k- k1 B3 \8 r
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 5 R: V3 M% J$ }+ h3 W
4 A6 b" m' j( GWho's the boss at your house?
/ d$ n' s2 R) N6 T( D1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 0 D; D& K0 k+ L Q' Q* r
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.. u7 |0 l, w2 s0 N1 Z1 q1 t
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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' ~1 h/ G' b3 g' A% K: MWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
1 |1 |+ d' `. z# t1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
+ h2 c2 o h5 v2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
5 ? ?, e6 q4 [; ~& z3 b0 Z3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
6 a! y% H3 B7 U( ?7 @4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
- I6 z, S& g- m1. Mothers don't do spare time.
5 u5 I, c: |# X: q2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 3 z" T" m- m$ T: F
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? 3 ^) i; s# L0 I
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery. _ b$ ?4 w9 h1 x" T: y+ d
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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0 f- C/ w8 I' h( d% p6 _If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? J6 x; |! U1 [
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
% w; M% \- Q5 x$ ], [ e" ?2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.3 `4 Q; G: c% N, o: w( _$ C
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. x. K" P) |6 d3 }
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